Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
