i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I understand Curling. That high.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Randomize