he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
