Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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