Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
