Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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