i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
