I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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