Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize