Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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