butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
