I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize