i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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