Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
