I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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