"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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