Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize