im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Randomize
