WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Help. Why am I so naked?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize