D3 body, D1 cock
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
