alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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