Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
