all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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