I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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