So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
