Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I'm experimenting with sincerity
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
