She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
