I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize