wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
