I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize