Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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