Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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