was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize
