I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
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