they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Randomize
