Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
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My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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