I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize