Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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