best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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