UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
