I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
