Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize
