dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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