Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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