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I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
