just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
