Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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