craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize