Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
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