nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize